The Whole Story

To all of you who read my post yesterday:

I want to give you a little more insight as to where I was coming from…

It’s just that parenting a teen isn’t easy.  I don’t think parenting is ever supposed to be easy.  I was just being very real about exactly how it is not easy.  🙂

Also, remember that I have absolutely NO experience when it comes to raising a teen.

I say all that to say this….  If you are considering becoming a foster parent or entering into a teen’s life in a parental role, don’t focus on posts like yesterday as though they are the full picture.

I have a foster daughter who has come from challenging school situations and is now not only on the honor roll, but has also been inducted into the national honor society.

I have a foster daughter that enjoys attending church…something NOT required of foster children, no matter the beliefs of the foster parents.

I have a foster daughter who I can trust for the most part.  Especially when it comes to home based things, such as:  babysitting, cleaning, her attitudes.  For the most part, I am so privileged to not have issues with trust.  And where trust breaks down, it is usually more for regular teen things that all parents have trouble trusting their kids with (or should).

I have a foster daughter who takes pride in keeping her room clean and doing her own laundry.  I have never had to pressure her to do personal care things at all.  She has taken this upon herself.

I have a foster daughter who is determined.  She made a decision when she came here that she was not going to skip homework and she was going to apply herself.  When she says she will do something, she is the most determined person I have met.  When I see that, it leads me to believe she will conquer her dreams as long as she stays focused.

I have a foster daughter who cares for the needy around her.  She cares about the homeless person in need of food.  We have often handed over food as we encountered homeless persons on the side of the road.  She is quick to point them out to me and hand me the food she wants to give them.  If she sees a stray dog, she is constantly reminding me that I need to call the Humane Society so the dog is taken care of.  She would have the dog come home with us if I let her (I have to draw the line somewhere).

Even as I write these things about TD, my heart overflows with love for her.

My challenges are often quite selfish.  I wish she loved us as much as we love her.  I wish she would let us in.  I wish we could be part of her life beyond surface things.  I wish I could just let it go and show my love extravagantly and not expect anything in return.

I do not doubt that God destined her to be in our home.  I know it was God’s will and He set us up to meet last year at the Childhelp Christmas party.  There is NO question in my mind.  I don’t doubt that we are doing the right thing.  My doubts are more internal – as I am unsure how to handle situations.  Where should I be strict and where should I ease up.  Should I let this go or not?

I just wanted to follow-up on yesterday’s post with a fuller picture.

Love you all!

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